What does Advent Look Like with Older Kids? (FREE Pocket Cards)

{Today I am so excited to welcome back as a guest writer, my mentor, a dear friend, and a fellow mom who has raised four boys and now helps those of us in the “little” years, Leslie!  This year we have so many families doing the Jesse Tree with teens and tweens.  I get questions often about how to include them in the advent experience and family devotional time.  Being that my oldest is eleven, I am just beginning to experience this season, so I invited someone who has lived it and is still living intentionally with her family celebrating Jesus at Christmas.  

Leslie writes at Sursee Gal, about the sursees (unexpected surprises that bring joy) she finds in her daily life.  Today she is giving each of you a Sursee through her wisdom and her words!  Prepare to be blessed and encouraged!}  

I think sometimes online there is a dearth of information about what life looks like in a house full of tweens and teens.  So many write about the days when the kids are little, but not so much about when the ages of their kids end in “teen.”

I can understand why.  Parenting teens is tricky and twisty and not always so spelled out.  I knew what to do when they were little and were nursing or toddling.

What about later when they are driving and kissing and grumping and then suddenly sweet and needing a hug?

Sheesh.  Not so easy.  Not so much conversation online.

Here are a few words from someone further down the road.  Or maybe we are on the same road and you need a little encouragement that you did a good job.  Clap, Clap. Gold Star for you, Mom!

Do what you can.

By this I mean whatever your Christmas tradition is, do what pieces of it you can and don’t worry that it doesn’t look the same as when they were little.

We celebrated with Advent Pockets that were packed with  little pieces of the nativity scene that we built on that window sill. The pocket also had a piece of paper that told about an activity we were going to do that day, and sometimes they had a physical SURSEE.  (A Sursee is an unexpected surprise that brings joy.)

As they grew up,  I made sure that the activities I put in the pocket jived with their school calendar.

For example, it might be a night with a basketball game, so voila!, That was the activity.  Before, when they were little, the activity might have been making a Christmas craft or going to see the trains at the mall.

As they grew, I filled the pocket with an iTunes gift card or Whataburger $$$.

The Sursees grew up with the boys.  The Sursees  mattered to the boys as teens.  The Sursees brought joy and reminded them they have a good God who loves them and longs to give them good gifts.

I took the idea of the pockets and I let it grow up with the boys and didn’t hang onto the past.

Be Flexible.

The pockets were  made to be opened each day, but as the  kids got older, that was not always possible so I tried to be flexible.

As in, let’s open all the pockets for this week on Sunday night when we are all together.

Really does it matter?  Does it matter if you open one a day or open all the week’s pockets on one day?

I decided that it did not matter and that the point was to celebrate Jesus coming as a baby.

Celebrate that we were together.  Celebrate the good news.  I didn’t sweat the details, I didn’t wait for it all to be perfect.  I embraced where our crazy family was and moved with it.  Flexibility is key.

Be Intentional. Be Fun.

You can do both, I promise.  

I tried to be intentional and fill the pockets with  Bible verses as they got older. Verses that explored the names of Jesus.  Verses foretelling  His coming found in the Old Testament.  Scripture that we could memorize.  Parts of the Nativity story to read. I also added in service projects we could do- ways we could bless others as a family.

But, I also included fun stuff.

I would leave in old papers chronicling things we did when they were little, and we would laugh about stuff that I had written.

I would put their favorite candy in the pocket or a hint about where a present was hidden.  (It was usually hidden in the piano bench.)  I tried to tie in worshiping and anticipating Jesus’ birthday with fun so that overall the boys would remember those days as good.

Which leads me to this.  

Overall, your kids are not going to remember many details from their growing up years.  They will remember a mom who smiled.  A mom who gave back tickles and head rubs.  A mom who made a special breakfast before a big game or put a fun Sursee in the Advent Pockets.

They will remember what you do far more than what you say.

I tried to do what I could. I tried to be intentional and flexible and fun.

A fine dance.  A dance led by the Holy Spirit living in you.  One that gets more intricate as you walk with Him and your kids grow up.  A great dance to learn when your kids are little so that when they are teens, you are really moving and grooving.

What better Sursee could there be than that?

Jacki here.  What great encouragement for each of us.  No matter the age of our kiddos, we are creating moments and memories through intentionally spending time with our family this Christmas…intentionally pointing them to their loving Savior.

I love Leslie’s idea of the advent pockets and placing cards inside as they got older with verses.

Guess what?  We have created some JESSE TREE Scripture cards just for you!  These would be great for your older kids to pop in their backpack, lunch box, or hang on the mantle each day.  You could even create some pockets if you wanted to do a countdown.

Even if your kids are still little, like mine, I love hanging these cards up on the mantle at our home as another way to visually remember the countless ways God has been faithful to us.

Enjoy!  JESSE TREE POCKET CARDS

{Please visit Leslie for more ways to find the unexpected joy in your mothering, your marriage, your walk with the Lord, and the everyday.}

Visit the Sursee Gal now!

Be encouraged to find the Sursees in every day

by following Leslie on Instagram.